At Bistro Don Giovanni in Napa, CA.

Emotions are life's gifts to us. Whether it's happiness, sadness, anger, they're all important in our lives—they all take us through the same process. They all come and go. The major difference between them is what we do with them. We're always seeking happiness. When we see it coming we say, "Yes, come here, I see you. Please stay with me, don't leave." Happiness smiles and says, "Oh, you've seen me, I can leave now." And it does.

Tasting wine at Duckhorn Winery in Napa.

With sadness, we see it coming, and we say, "Go away, I don't want you around." And sadness sighs and says, "Here we go again, I'm going to have to get bigger and bigger for you to hear me and learn what I have to teach." So it persistently nudges us and says, "Over here, acknowledge me!" until it gets our attention. Then it leaves.

Checking out the grapes.

It'll do you good to know this: Embrace your positive emotions and be grateful for your negative ones—they all have something to teach you. It's your response and openness to learn from them that make a difference. Life in its normal state is a series of cycles, a series of beginnings and endings, a series of changes. Negative emotions cause us to be dissatisfied. And dissatisfaction is the precious fuel that drives us to want more out of life. If everything were to be 'happy' and satisfying all the time, we would be comfortably stagnant and not challenged to grow, be wiser, stronger and more courageous.

You are the wellspring of your own emotions. This means you're responsible for your own feelings. No one should be held accountable for the way you feel when you're the one who has total control of how you choose to feel. You may try to find a person or thing to make you feel complete and happy, but depending on things outside yourself to be responsible for your happiness can be short-lived. You have to take ownership of your self and your actions, and therefore this includes your own feelings. When you place someone or something responsible for the way you feel, you're no longer completely in control of your own emotions.

Chilling after dinner.

Check out the full moon.

Greeting the fish at Brix restaurant in Napa.

It's like this: Let's say you want to produce the juiciest, most refreshing orange juice to share with others. You plant the seeds; you monitor the weather and make certain the seeds get enough water; you go out of your way to find a rare type of fertilizer to nourish the soil; then, you patiently wait for the right season when you can gather your oranges to be squeezed. Let's say you went through the challenge of each step, without procrastinating or placing your responsibility on someone else. Your oranges are perfect! What do you think you're going to get when you squeeze those oranges? Nothing, but the juiciest, most refreshing orange juice—simply because you can't squeeze anything else out of them other than what you've nurtured them to produce!

Time for some Domaine Chandon champagne!

I finally found Joseph Phelps!

Taking control of your own emotions works the same way. You have to make a decision on how you want to feel (regardless of the situation) and take full responsibility for that decision. No one can squeeze lemon juice from an orange anymore than they can squeeze hostility out of you if you choose not to nourish your wellbeing with that behavior. This is why it's important to take the time to nurture your inner being according to your highest standard of living. This way, when the pressure of life squeezes you with negativity, you're not going to 'react' and reciprocate more negativity. Instead, you'll be in control of your emotions and only respond in a state you choose to be in.

Simply beautiful...

Time to taste some wine.

Just because it's easier to deal with happiness doesn't mean you should deny sadness when it arrives. That wouldn't be fair to you and the lessons you have to learn. Instead, graciously smile at sadness when it arrives. It deserves your attention because it's your emotion and therefore a part of you. So be kind to yourself and gratefully acknowledge sadness because it is here to teach you another great life lesson. When you're able to confront sadness truthfully and just get down to dealing with it one step at a time, it gets done and it usually gets done well.

Enjoying the scenery.

It's important to remember that emotions are just that...emotions. It's normal for us to have emotions; it's even normal for us to feel angry. Emotions like anger are only harmful when they're held in and 'starved'. When we hold in anger, it builds and we find ourselves exploding on innocent people in the most astounding circumstances. Then we end up feeling bad about ourselves and getting anger backlash from others. We need to find safe places to let our anger out.

Time to say good-bye.

So go ahead, find your 'safe' place and face all your emotions—tell them who's in charge. Choose a positive state of being according to your highest standard of living, and stick to it! Remember—you are the master of your life; you are the captain of your emotions. Take control of your self; rid yourself of negativity. Pretty soon, you'll find that negative behavior of others will have little or no effect on you in a negative way because you simply don't have negativity in you to give.